User blog:Rena Charming/Miniview - "Best Laid Plans"

Cute, my very last mini-view was of 408. 8 episodes ago. See what upsetting me leads to, wikians? You miss out on my awesome episode commentaries. Yeah, sleep on that tonight. This is so not abrasive of me, at all. Lol.

Finally, after nearly 24 hours since it first "came out", I was able to watch this episode. After waiting for hours last night to find a link, and after trying in vain last morning to download the episode (thanks, torrents chock-full of viruses!), I took the hint: God clearly didn't want me to watch this episode. So I stopped trying, enjoyed an otherwise wonderful day and gave it another go now.

And let me tell ya, I did not hate this episode. I quite enjoyed watching it, even though I found it to be mostly laughable throughout. I literally found myself laughing at times when I was probably not supposed to laugh (Ursula and Cruella falling through the portal - pfahahahah those clumsy cows). Once Upon a Time continues to shock with its unintentional mixed morals and contrived plotlines, but seeing as how I was mildly entertained, I'll bite.

Since this is a mini-view, I won't do a scene-by-scene rundown, let me just throw at you several mixed breadcrumbs I can think of as I write this. Take the fact that, for some reason, these days, every spell, curse or magical whatchamacallit is like the chicken pox, it can only affect you once. It started with "Shattered Sight" and was mildly acceptable by then. By the time it was extended to whom could be crammed back into the Sorcerer's hat (tough luck, Chernabog, you only get a go), it was already contrived. Now sleeping curses are included, which mostly raises a few questions. Is a sleeping curse any different from a sleeping spell? Seriously, are there two different things for that? Henry was not affected in this episode because he'd already befallen a sleeping curse at the end of season 1. Yet he was put to sleep all through episode 3.04, farting in MRJ's face notwithstanding. So, again, are there two things that work differently, or just poor continuity as usual? And if this was indeed a sleeping curse that Maleficent cast outside of the usual spinning needles and red apples, then, is EVERYONE in Storybrooke now literally dancing to "Disco Inferno" in the Netherworld? Do the writers care? And the third, most important question: is poor clueless Aurora just totally mindfucked when everyone around her goes to sleep? (Joe also raised the important question of whether or not someone, maybe Granny, was holding baby Neal and passed out on top of the poor crushed child - look, Anna didn't give a crap about leaving him with the murderous Evil Queen in 4.10 and I'm not gonna give a crap now). Questions. So many questions. Will they be answered? Hahahahah let's move on.

Snow and Charming. Sigh, sigh, sigh. What on earth are the writers thinking? Let me be clear on something: Snow murdering Cora WAS a good way of blurring the lines. We can all take Snow's side (except Lady Junky but omg who cares) because we know Cora was up to no good, but her moral debate back then and the wrong thing she did are far more acceptable and realistic (as realistic as making someone die by means of heart-placing and magic candles and Neverland poison can be) than this random crap of stealing a dragon baby because your daughter could be good or evil. I... have to break all of this crap down into segments and cover each of them, one by one, to make all my points. There's just so many points to make. First of all, I am NOT a believer that we are all born blank slates like the apprentice put it. That's just not my doctrine, I know some people (Ben? I think so) believe that, which is fine, it's not like there's much of a way to prove it. As much as I KNOW that we are all shaped by the circumstances and environment we find ourselves in, I also believe we are born with certain psychological and spiritual inclinations. This is not me nitpicking on the show per se, just sharing my belief, please bear with it. Still, look... this is all happening because Emma was born with the potential for great light or great darkness. Good or evil. I know, I know, the word to emphasize is GREAT. Being the product of true love yadda yadda she was gonna be a great whatever. Better be a superhero than a supervillain. But, seriously, strip it down a bit more, please. At the end of the day, what they are saying is as basic as this: Emma could be good or evil. So. Could. Anyone. Ok, show? Any damn baby could grow up to be good or evil or in-between. Me nitpicking? Absolutely, yeah. Just seems like a dumb dilemma when you really stop to think about it though. Now, back to the moral stuff. OUaT has got it bad, really bad. They keep romanticizing the villains, trying to get us to sympathize with them by means of backstory and present-day redemption quests. We all know Belle and Rumple are endgame OTP, and at this point I cannot possibly understand how such a thing might one day, in the long long haul, even be feasible. He's so far over the edge he's fallen down Wile E. Coyote style. I don't even hate him, mind you, I've been quite entertained by Rumple's evil path this season, ever since he fully embraced his darkness. Better than the back-and-forth dance he kept doing before. But if I never really shipped Rumbelle, I certainly don't now. But yeah, we're still rooting for Regina because we love her and we're willing to overlook the fact that she doesn't deserve a happy ending any more than Joey does, but, my point was, the writers want us to sympathize with the villains, right? Well, what the hell do they want from us in regard to the heroes then? Because... wtf Snowing? This is not blurring the lines. It's just really fucked up. I had to LAUGH at the amount of times David rationalized stuff in this episode, and how he was just so willing to keep lying to everyone. Lol he don't give two fucks. And when Snow told him there was no way to undo what they did because baby dragon was gone, he said, "How do we fix US?" LMFAO HOW SELFISH CAN YOU FUCKING BE?!! LOLOL. I can relate to that, Charming, I'm way too self-centered too. But I'm more Charming than you so I get to. Oh, and how funny was it when Snow turned to him all teary-eyed and said, "CHARMING, we did something bad". Not "David", "Charming". Ha, this show. We gotta give these actors more credit, they say the stupidest, cheesiest things with serious and dramatic faces all the time. Brava. But yeah, back on track: Snowing are perhaps the most polarizing characters on this show, and if they aren't more loved/hated it's because ultimately who really gives a crap about them? So, what ARE the writers doing with them? This attempt at making them more layered and interesting is really short-sighted.

Now, let's talk continuity. Haha these writers. They subtly explained away Snow and Charming being told about the Curse for the first time by Rumple by having them basically swear to never bring up the shiz with Maleficent ever again. And the mobile tehe. Now, this is interesting, what these writers do. The mobile was there from the pilot, we've had flashes back to it, Snow touching it with tearful eyes in 3.11, the whole nine yards. In this episode, we learned its origins. Snow hates it because it brings back painful memories, but by the end she decides to keep it because of said memories. So basically we get this big self-contained revelation that's completely out of the blue but doesn't retcon anything per se because it explains itself away almost immediately. Like any average magic trick, it's all a basic illusion, see? Am I gonna be upset at such a cheap plot trick? Hell no, Cinderella was mentioned, color me excited. That's how my mind works.

Can Hook miss an episode already? He's long overdue for an absence and he was so somber and frustratingly jealous and still somehow irrelevant in this episode. Like, go do something else. Lol, Mary Margaret and David debating whether or not Gold would succeed in his quest to darken Emma's heart and Emma is RIGHT FUCKING THERE, hugging Hook, two feet away. They were... they were talking rather loudly, I'm just saying. Like, how do you not wave your hands at the screen and scream what I just said when faced with such glaring idiocy?

I liked Henry's overall involvement in this episode. 'Bout damn time he did anything noticeable. Unlike Belle. Cute that she just keeled over and banged her horns on the floor. Now she's even dumber than before, way to go. Lol no I kid but she's really stupid. Last episode, she couldn't even immediately deduce herself that Rumple had conned her again, Emma had to jump to such a conclusion. Belle, you don't owe intelligence and quick-thinking much. Sometimes I doubt she can even actually read. Just wait for the episode Belle is holding a book upside down, it's bound to happen. Btw, happy 50th episode, Belle! :)

I thought the whole spell regarding Lily being sent away felt as trite as the next anything that happens on this show, but by the end we knew Gorin (?) was behind such an idea, so let's just wait and see "why". Not sure how I feel about the "author" being a job, not an entity. Not sure how I feel about them completely writing August off for the whole episode on a sickness that didn't expand into anything much either, but whatever, guess he wasn't needed and at least he's still alive, hopefully to stick around on a more permanent basis. I do not ship Emma/August (Trojan Swan? Get it?) nor have I ever even seen the potential for such a pairing even way back in season 1, I just like Pinocchio and want more of him.

Maleficent saw her child as a baby because. Oh and she deduced the child was alive. Cos she couldn't have been killed since that time, in 30 years. Potato logic, but it's still kinda cool to see the Mistress of All Evil being motherly and tearful, and we've gotten plenty of that. Now, is Lily super evil? Or does she only become evil in a magical environment? She didn't seem all that evil to me in 4.05. Just a blossoming little lesbian. But this is Disney and Disney clearly thinks gay = evil. Not only has Mulan not been seen since very subtly and undecidedly coming out, she hasn't even been mentioned or explained away. I'm js.

I ended up nitpicking on a lot more than I originally thought I would, but I honestly quite liked this episode. Walt's mention was cool, a lot of explanations were provided and I'll take them all tbh. Curious as to what Gold has cooked up for Regina and what he meant when he spoke to a sleepy Belle, but other than that I'm not very excited about 417. I have long waited for a Robin Hood centric because I wanted to see the show's take on that classical story, so explain to me why the very first one sends him on a trip to Oz? I just can't, okay? I put up with a lot of crap from this show but I'm kinda sick of them defying my expectations. At this point they're wiping their asses with them. If Marian is Zelena that'll just be fucking shit gravy. They have really ruined Robin Hood for me this season and I don't think this episode will so much help fix that as it will cement it. They can still surprise me positively, sure, I didn't go into 415 expecting much and I loved it, from start to finish. I guess in that sense the show IS unpredictable. But this season has been far too uneven, way more so than usual, full of cool highs and very low lows, and a bad episode is now almost a guarantee.

Rating the Episode:
 * Flashback story = 3 out of 5 stars. Not all that entertaining, best part really was the stealing of the egg, which is also the most frustrating part (just that it HAPPENS), so what does that tell you? Ursulla and Cruella's inclusion was fun, but most of the flashbacks were quite necessary but ultimately boring exposition.
 * Present-day action = 4 out of 5 stars. Sleeping curse and August's disposal felt like cheap gimmicks, but a lot actually happened when you add it all up.
 * Usage of cast = 3 out of 5 stars. Snow, Charming and Henry were all underused in the first half of the season so it's nice for them to be featured now, but Hook was wasted, Belle even more so and Will was absent. So, it's balanced out.
 * Writing = 4 out of 5 stars. Kalinda didn't tarnish this episode, probably because of the wonderful Jane Espenson. Other than the aforementioned "Charming" line, the dialogue was not cheesy or poorly written in this one. I quite liked Snow's moral commentaries on what they were doing. Basically, yes, Snowing was still talking about the same stuff they're always talking about these days, but better written. Kudos.

Overall rating: 14/20. So, good. Fair too. Nice job then.