User blog:Jdg98/4.21/22 - "Operation Mongoose" Review

Writing from the past again. #Typical. I… should I even bother with an introduction or just get straight to what we all know is coming with the funny pictures and captions and what not? Meh, finale looks good; if it wasn't then lol.

In episode 4.13 (or 4.14, because fuck you Frozen arc), "Unforgiven", we continued to be teased with the Charmings' "dark secret". It was highly riveting, or at least it would have been if anyone actually gave a shit, and all culminated in Maleficent being resurrected because… never mind how! We also had Regina yelling at Pinocchio (ugh) and some shit with Captain Swan (ugh). Like, you know an episode's bad when its best scene belongs to Belle. :| But it all started when Mary Alice Margaret had a terrible dream…

"We know what you did…" "It makes us sick…" "We're going to tell." *BANG*

Seriously Mary Margaret was really gunning (lol?) for our favorite suicidal housewife's old position… she even provided a voiceover at the end.

"Usually there's nothing newsworthy about my life, but that all changed when I killed this baby…" "Honey are you still flappin' those lips?"

In episode 4.14, "Enter the Dragon", we finally saw the origin of Maleficent and Regina's so-called friendship, and it was great. We also saw the so-far only "Before the Curse" Aurora scene and… just, k. "K" is all I can say with what they did with that story. Oh, also Emma basically came out with all her panty-soaking worry for Regina and Rumple raped Belle.

"Um, Killian… what are you doing…?" "Don't worry, I'm a pirate…"' "I know, but, is this normal or…?" "Shhh… shhh… pirate…" "I'm feeling kind of uncomforta—" "Will you just shut up and lemme grope you?!" (Only one person squeezes like dat…)

In episode 4.15, "Poor Unfortunate Soul", we saw OUaT concoct a flashback salad of all the shit that they didn't get to put into 3.06. Cute! This was actually a very good episode, in most ways, and even subverted the trope of the black one always dying first 'cause Ursula left at the end.

"I'm gettin' out 'fore the gettin' gets bad." "Say 'hi' to Rapunzel."

In episode 4.16, "Best Laid Plans", we finally saw what has been foreshadowed by this show for a good 4 episodes – the Charmings sent baby Lily to another land! Ugh, they didn't even have Rapunzel chained up in their basement (haha, 2nd joke about that bitch less than three lines apart). And we also saw how Crursula got to our land.

"Oh no ma shoes is slippin'!" "All I wanted woz sum scrambled egg for ma fried chicken!" "Obai bishes!"

Meanwhile, in the present…

#50thAppearance

In episode 4.17, "Heart of Gold", we got the biggest, most shockingest, most spectacularest, most spoiledest twist in the history of the show! Guys, guys, guys… Will is from Oz! *gasp* *gasp* *gasp* Nah but Marian is Zelena. *sigh* *sigh* *sigh*

Dun, dun… …dun! "Zelena…" "Are you shocked tho?" "Naht reli…" "What but I haven't even made a 'Wicked' pun in like a month!" "About the same time I read about this on STV."

In episode 4.18, "Sympathy for the De Vil", Cruella was captured by the Initiative and they put a chip in her brain so that she couldn't hurt anyone (a reference that like one person is gunna get). Nah but this ep was awesome – I mean, who didn't love finding out that the reason Cruella is evil is because… well, she enjoyed it? Great. Fantastic. Love a good psychopath. But… then Emma killed her… in such an abrupt manner… and then… she made… this face…

#BlackSwan "Tbh if she doesn't wipe her damn eyes sometime in the next 4 episodes I don't even care if she forgives us…" "Ikr?"

Ofc that's nothing compared to this deformed lil scoundrel.

"Down's Syndrome's a bitch."

In episode 4.19, "Lily", we had an Emma-centric wherein the actual character of Lily was sorta tossed around here and there, or so it felt. Also, apparently when you don't shoot someone in the fact in cold blood in the middle of a street out in the real world with actual people-laws, that acquaints to you not being evil? I mean, I'd acquaint that to you not being a fucking moron, but whatevs. And then… the ending… OMG the ending… I burst out laughing, ngl. It was just, so facepalmy, yunno?

"I took the test sis and guess wot ur bf's cum got me all pregged up." *Yet another episode ending on a delayed reaction close-up.*

In episode 4.20, "Mother", Espenson the Great and Powerful came along and made us all feel totally better about everything, because guys she's better than the Almighy Yahweh himself. I mean, if you can make this show make some kind of… sense, on a fairly emotional/human level, then you just deserve all the medals in all the realms and, just, well: our respect. Free (three?) cheers for Jane, peeps! Hip, hip, Coray – bitch. This episode was fantastic, I loved pretty much everything about it. From Wicked fetuses to poor people weddings…

"Erm did u naht c the sign this is private propz!" "Soz ur maj'stay it'z just it woz this or Primark yanno?" "…"

"Vaccum at the ready dada I'm 'bout to go EQ on deze chavz."

Can we just say that this was the finale wedding they were talking about? Like, close 'nuff, rite? But anyway, on with the actual finale review I suppose…

"Urm I don't think you mentioned our story?"

OMG cute that you think you have a story! Almost as much as Rena when he thought you'd be somehow relevant. But yeah, alright, again; review…

Alright, so… not an entirely dreadful episode but… not the best either. It definitely beats Season 2's abortion of a finale, but it comes nowhere near close to the greats of Seasons 1 and 3. I really wanted OUaT to defy its patterns; great finale, crap finale, great finale, crap finale. And the same goes for midseason finales, but in the opposite order (1.07 kinda boring until Graham actually dies tbh). Alas… no. We got what we got. No use complaining. It's just. GAHHH WTF?! WE DIDN'T EVEN GET TO SEE AURORA IN MADONNA'S SWIM CAP!

We started the episode with a flashback – perhaps the actually most boring fucking flashback we've ever had in the history of the show. The only good thing about it is that I realize now it takes place the same time as Walt Disney's death, meaning he's the preceding Author, but, like… that's not that cool. Hehe, first time I watched it I thought it was set in 1996 – how little sense that makes all round. As it is we got a very cliché story for Isaac. He had someone in his life that was rude to him.

"I represent heroes for some reason." "Y'all gonna pay for this shit…"

Maybe the writers thought they could get away with this warped logic (which comes home to roost in Isaac's confrontation with the Charmings at the end of the two hour instravaganza) because they knew that half the audience would be asleep by this point? I mean, I admit, when I first watched it I was dozing off. Well… for the scene with the boss I was actually looking at the guest cast and crying (MEGHAN ORY YOU HAVE NO WORK EVEN!!??!!) and then for the next bit I felt my eyes getting a little heavy and I kind of had to force myself onward.

"It was really nice of y'all at the Make A Wish to meet with me." *Not another Downie headed for beyond…*

After the Apprentice opened up the doorway to heaven (if that's where Jews even go; Author had a Bar Mitzvah! Let's just say Walt Disney would NOT have approved…), we were taken back to the present day, where our heroes had decided to stop Gold and Isaac by… searching the Sorcerer's mansion. Look, I know Lily Sparks likes to call the Charmings stupid almost as much as she masturbates to the idea of Swan Queen finally getting it on, but – this was kind of on all of them, right? I mean, you know exactly who's putting the town in danger, and not one of you thinks to check the shop? ''Come. On.'' They easily coulda stormed the place and just stopped everything right then and there, and then spared is this… rather pointless finale. But moo ig. Moo. Oh, and then August appeared.

"Whoa is that wood varnish and Asian whores I smell?" "S'up."

He revealed that he'd been approached by the Apprentice years before – an encounter I'm sure we'll never see any flashbacks of any fucking sort – and he thus has a well-detailed drawing of him because, well, he can't have a hobby? Jeez, guys, back off! Alright, so thanks to Hook we were led to the Apprentice's house where the Blue Fairy freed him and… I'm sorry, I can't. I kinda can't with this. It reminded me of the chipped cup being repaired last minute in 2.22, only much worse. Hook knew an old man was trapped in this hat, and apparently Blue could have freed him the entire time, but now they know he's the Apprentice they decide that he's suddenly important enough?

"Lol forget I can do magic."

Oh, honey, we all do. Also Snow and Charming should have recognized him because of 4.16; le moo. After a li'l awkward exchange with Hook, everyone started dashing about. Swan Queen wanted to get to the shop (finally!) to stop Gold and Isaac, while the Charmings, Hook and Henry (#TeamIrrelevant) headed back to the apartment to get the page and key in which to re-trap the Author. Also Hook grabbed the book because… why exactly? He says later that he found it very important that he do so, but I honestly have no idea what he thought he was accomplishing.

Meanwhile, there was a scene that we all skipped because it was shown in the sneak peek.

"Soz can't bring back the dead." "What about the guest stars?" "What about them?"

It culminated in Isaac marking the end to his new story, which we were all super excited about because it meant that the fun of the fairytale land was going to start after a mere one act! Oh, right, OUaT likes to drag its more boring shit for as long as it can. Instead, we got like 12 minutes of Henry running around. But at least the kid was finally brought into the forefront.

"Yay for me!"

Tehe. The funny thing is I put that pic into gender guesser and it said he was 32. But after Henry drove (okay… pretty sure he destroyed half the street when he tried that in 3.17?) all the way to like New York or wherever cos I don't really care, we quickly learn that Isaac has made himself into the best-selling Author of all time! Because… why? Why? His M.O of storytelling makes absolutely zero sense. He's made a name for himself because he subverted the usual trope of heroes getting happy endings, and made it so the villains win. Okay, that makes enough sense. But… he's swapped them. The villains have happy endings, yes, but only by being heroes – as far as the audience is concerned, they were never evil, and vice versa. So really he's subverted nothing at all. You can only actually get it if you've been watching the show itself for 4 damned years. I mean, I guess the name Snow White carries some weight, but ain't nobody even heard of a Regina before! She just some YOLO bandit! So yeah, to sum up: it dumb. Not that we had time to think about any of this, because Lily Sparks soon cameo'd.

"What does Regina's vagina taste like?" "Red pepper flakes. Gives it some kick."

I can reference old lines, too! :D Then Henry converged on the scene, and pretty soon he and Isaac (bored of writing his name, must be because he's already appearing too damn much') were fighting for the key. Henry was ready to shove it into the page's hole and Isaac responded by taunting him. Ugh! You never taunt people who have power over you! That's just a sure fire way to screw yourself over! Goddamn dummy… So yeah, as soon as he could Henry found whatever page had a door on it and used his key to rape it, consequently trapping he and Isaac inside the book itself. :O

This takes place at the end of Act 2. Act freaking 2. This is how long it's taken us to get to the Enchanted Forest, and the only characters who have had more than one scene so far are Henry and the Author. Just… let this sink in, a'ight? And then…

"Suhprise mothafucka!!!"

Without the ability to call ChildLine, Henry has helplessly tied to a… a thing, stuck with no means of escape as a surprisingly decent CGI ogre trotted along lookin' for munchies.

"Fee fi fo fum, gonna eat you like I ate Belle's mum!"

Nah but as Mary Margaret would have us know – "Those would be giants". That's the second time I've referred to an old line in this review, neither of which were referred to within the episode itself, which – as far as I am – hasn't made any yet. Tbh js I kinda know this show the best alright? So, as the ogre approached, all Henry could do was pray ("Shrek is love," he whispered, "Shrek is life."), and, sure enough, the Gods were smiling over him, because Rumplestiltskin a knight was ready and waiting to slay the mighty beast!

*vroooorp* "It's all ogre now, laddie."

With a belly most assuredly full of haggis, Sir Bagpipes rode off to save another village, much to Isaac's chagrin. He must've given less thought to his plan than Eddy and Adam when they decided all of this was a good idea. Like then, he freakin' wrote it!! Henry was able to use a book he snagged to track the den of Bandit Regina and… she was kind of a cunt tbh. Didn't really find them at all cute together. It's sort of an odd situation, because Regina, known for playing a villain who's now turned nice in the present, is playing a hero in the past who's going through a period of being kind of bitchy. All in all, I was getting a lot of mixed messages. Mixed messages that were put to rest when she burned the fucking book! Boo, you whore! Henry was luckily able to snag a page, or not so luckily because it didn't even come in useful later. Whatever. Also he kept calling Regina "mom" throughout the episodes – at some point you just gotta quit it, kid. Don't think he said Regina once, at least not to her face. This interaction gave us two classic lines: "My name's Henry, and I'm your son." // "Did you?" "Yes." I enjoyed most of these, but it did make me realize that this episode was half-written for them already… and what they added to it really wasn't particularly great. But at least we got this, right? (He said, sarcastically…)

"Been eatin' nothin' but apples of late."

It was rather cool seeing Isaac get trapped in the classic Snow net, and even cooler watching the seven Dark Dwarfs come to take him away. I quite liked how the "Long live Regina!" badge factored in, but tbh they shoulda had more of a swap.

Cheery. Nursey. Smarty. Chatty. Immuney. Alerty. Less-than-content-with-lifey.

But who cares because then we got our first non-sneak-peek-promotional-trailer look at Snow Dark! And let me tell you she was pure fapulosity. Adore her and the creepy music she rode in on. But she was naht at all Happy to be faced with Isaac's ridiculous tales about this land…

"Honey you're phoning it in more than me in this corset."

He was able to prove himself, however, by knowing all about her first true love, Prince James, and how she took his twin's brothers heart so that she could keep having sex with him in some, small way… Gotta say, I loved Charming as the Huntsman. Just felt like a really clever crossover. BUT the fact that he was always with Snow made me think Graham shoulda been around Regina more? Meh, nah, who cares even because he said that he would "always find" her in an ironically ironical way and I loved it. :3 He had a full heart though, and I'm honestly not sure where I stand on it.

We then had our third and final sneak peek scene of the episode, and it was the best of the bunch. I was quite surprised that it happened in Act 5, because I expected it to be much earlier, but it was still as much fun as ever. About the most fun that this episode ever had with its swapovers, tbh. Which is a shame. Woulda been nice to see this scene for the first time in the ep. In fact, I find that true for the entire finale. It found it quite lukewarm because of how much I had bigged up my expectations, but if they had just given us minor hints as to what was coming… I honestly think I might have been blown away by this. It's really quite the shame. We finally learned what happened after Snow backed up a good ten feet to throw a fireball, as well as the fact that she only did this so that she could be smacked in the face by a door. Yes, Robin Hood – Regina's competition ;) – and his arrows arrived to save the day, and many a lesbian was up in arms.

"Dafuq even??"

Outlaw Queen made it to a cute little tavern (maybe the one in which they were supposed to meet? Probably not…) and right now I'm wondering where Henry's even wandered the fuck off to. He appears later outside the tavern right? Oh yeah he mentions something about figuring she'd be in Sherwood Forest… LIKE HE KNOWS JUST WHERE THAT IS OFF THE TOP OF HIS HEAD?!! OMG, maybe that's what the page told him! The page he ripped from the fire! It told him where Regina would be in this moment, and how to get there! I sure as hell hope so, and while he was figuring all of this Robin and Regina were stealing Captain Swan's iconic scene where he pours alcohol onto her cut and wraps a bandage round it – TBH!

Apparently Zelena's happy ending was marrying Robin Hood… which is odd if you think about it. She's not aware of her past jealousies, so why would she care even? It's not like she loves Robin in the present. Her happy ending is to keep her sister from achieving her happy ending? Lol, for someone who spent her whole life being envious she sure focuses a lot of her time on the person she's jealous of. Dumb hoe. But aw well because she looked and acted really adorable as the doting bride!

"This bodice killed our baby! :D"

Regina is super sad because she was really starting to love Robin Hood after the whole five minutes she spent with him, and she leaves in a huff. Henry is annoyed too because Regina has to stop Robin and Zelena's wedding – because their church bells signifies the end of the book's story and thus the solidification of its events. Even tho… couldn't Henry just plunge the key in once he gets spat out and try all over again? Meh idk how it works. Like Rena said this show is only popular because of the magic is uses on its audience members anyway. Would you believe me if I told you Will Scarlet doesn't even exist? Hehe, I'm sure most fans would be inclined to ask, "Who?".

After revealing that not only did she switch with Snow White, but Zelena as well, Regina begins to ask about Henry's other mother, who Isaac said wasn't in the story. But that's not true at all; turns out it takes more than a pen and ink to put the savior down... wonder if that's a good thing.

"THERE'S NO TOILET IN HEEEEEERRREEE!!!!"

This was the end of part 1, and it really was a lot less impressive than last year's. Regina arresting Emma, separating her from Hook, before she had the chance to give Snow the ring that would put time back on track… it was rather perfect, yunno? This was just Emma screaming. And, as we later find out, she was screaming for no damn reason. Her mind is entirely intact. To her, she's been locked up for like 2 hours prolly. So… yeah. Guess she really did just need to pee real bad.

The first scene of part 2 featured Belle, which really must've been just a huge slap in the face to Jo, tbh. To have her so close to part 1 and yet… so far. Anyway, she's now a doting wife and apparently Rumbelle kidnapped Prince Neal?

"Are you fat enough to be my mommy?"

Meh, I guess her face is. Isaac was also knocking about, insulting Belle's water, and as she pissed off to get him a new glass (take that rather literally), the former Author was messing with Rumple's mindhole. It really seemed in this scene at first like Rumple could remember everything from before. Not Bae, but, that Isaac had written his happiness for him. I don't think so though? Or maybe? Or not? Or yes? Tbh, just moo. Point is, Isaac ran to yet another peep to get them to kill Henry and Regina. All of his darting about and having persuasive conversations with people felt like very poor writing really, but this is OUaT, so what can one expect?

"Don't you wish we hadn't written both halves?"

Henry found Hook in the meantime, and it was time to introduce the most special guest of the whole episode – Black Beard! Yay!!! (?) Nah, but seriously, when you make Guest Stars TBA, you at least include somebody that people actually give a shit about. This episode should have been packed with iconic fairytale guests wearing one another's costumes. But no. Not so much as a CGI guard wolf Ruby. Instead, what we got was nerd Hook, who looked like he was about to have a pimples outbreak or trip over his headgear at any damn minute. Found him annoying tbh. But, fun fact, when you're on a ship, and you pull on literally anything, it'll cause some sort of chain reaction and knock out your foe! It has happened quite a few times on this show, and I guess Henry really does pick up on shit after all. Good for the scamp! So, he and Hook stole the Jolly Roger, sailed it all the way to Emma's tower, made a reference to Star Wars that I'm sure barely anyone got, and they freed her.

As mentioned above, Emma was perfectly fine and could remember everything. The Black Knight guarding her prison, however, was still very much in character – it was Lily, and when she learned that Emma had escaped, bitch looked angry enough to pop a boner right there and then.

"And after I hosed down your shit bucket…"

Her eyes were glowing, and I think we all know what that means!

"Hell yeah we do! Tash-hag Luby!"

Hush it bitch, you weren't in the ep! Or… the season at all, for that matter. Aaaaaand now I'm sad. Have Maleficent's eyes ever glowed before she became a dragon? Don't fuckin' think so. But yeah, Lily went all dragon-rage and, in an actually pretty-cool scene, the Jolly Roger peeps shot her down with a cannon. It was all just so delightfully fantastical, yunno? Not the standard I expect from a finale, though. To celebrate their grand victory, goat's milk was shared all around, and I actually found the fact that Hook was allergic to rum kinda cute and funny. :P

Back at the Dark Palace, Snow Dark (been a damn while) was seeing to her evil royal council. Hehe, this was awesome; I particularly liked the looks of Bad Granny. This scene mentioned the Blue Fairy having dark fairy dust and whatnot, but wouldn't it have been a lot better if we'd actually gotten to see that? Lol, this show… this fucking show… The most shocking part of this scene was of course Doc's death, because we didn't know at this point what would become of it. But then, in the very next scene, Hook died too after training swords with Emma (where did she get that outfit? Jolly Roger wardrobe?) and as soon as Charming's sword pierced through his back, each and every single one of us at home was just like, "Oh, okay then, deaths in this reality don't count then." Because yeah. A part of me wishes that Hook really did die for real, because he's been pointless for the longest time now, but most of me just didn't really care at all. Oh, and this was also the second time in this finale that one of the characters pretended to believe what one of the norms was saying, before revealing that they didn't, because… lazy writing, okay? Because plain bad writing.

"OMG I rmmbr you are my daughter!" "Nouai reli you believe me?" "LOL nope killed ur boyf." "Ugh, moms…"

Rumple returned to Belle in the meantime and idrc what happened because I was too distracted by the ugliness of the all new chipped cup. Like srsly the prop dudes couldn't find the same damn set? Meh, I guess Rumple did smash them all but, like… the Author can surely resurrect a cup. Rumple himself did in 2.22 innit. But yeah Belle was totes livid.

"How'mai s'posed ter glurg ma silly juice from dis mess?"

After basically convincing her husband to commit child murder I think, the future victims were all meeting up in Regina's tree. I'm sure all the Swan Queen shippers were happy, what with Emma finally having entered Regina's underground hole, but Henry was there so that's about as dirty as it gets. Regina compliments Henry on managing to free Emma, which I quite liked, but then she started giving the blonde parenting tips, and it was like hunni plz. The topic soon moved on to that of true love, and HA! Whatever hope the shippers had a second ago just died. It was a whole convo between Emma and Regina about Hook and Robin! Lily Sparks' worst freakin' nightmare! XD Emma says she lurrrrbed Hook, and this convinces Regina to do what nnids to be done. They make it to Robin's wedding, and the church bells still haven't sounded, but we were all too blown away by Michael Socha's performance to give a shit.

"I mailed my letter of resignation last week."

Seriously, it was like OUaT was trying to break its own damn record for worst usage of a mainie! I thought it was impossible to use anyone worse than Will was used in 4.11, but here we are, another 11 episodes later and he's in pretty much the exact same boat, without feeling any more important than when he first arrived. Even less so, I'd say. Although, the bishop was from Snowing's wedding in the pilot, and I thought that was cool.

The trio of lesbianness then showed up, and Emma made a comment about actions needing to speak louder than words. I know how generic this saying is, but I'm totally taking it as a reference to Snow in 1.16. :3 Then Rumple showed up and ruined everything. Ugh, even when he's good he's still fucking evil! Emma and Rumple engaged in a swordfight, which I suppose was meant to be this episode's climax. :/ Regina, meanwhile, couldn't bring herself to fully go inside the church and stop the wedding, which I now realize is a reference to the fact that she couldn't go into the tavern and approach Robin Hood originally back in 3.03. Cute! Emma was losing the battle, and Henry stepped up, but this only ended in Regina being slashed open like a piñata at Lana Parrilla's own fifteenth birthday fiesta. This totally ruined the wedding though, and Zelena was naht happy about her sister yet again stealing focus on her special day.

"Oh great now it's raining paint…"

Everything worked out for the very best though, because although the church bells had rung, the Author's shittiness had made it so that Henry could fill in for him as the new Author, and he used his mother's blood (don't even ask me how that worked…) to set everything straight again.

"Mind if I borrow some intestine?" "Good boys say 'please', young man."

Totes knew he wasn't her son. But yeah Henry wrote some shit and everyone's back in Storybrooke – fuckin' hooray! Basically, everything that we just went through was entirely pointless, so… yeah, okay, it just was. Every last detail that they return to in town is the same as it was at the end of 4.20. I… just moo, really. Except for Henry being the Author. But, somehow, that feels less major than Emma deciding not to go home to New York. Lol. Emma rushed home to look for Hook, and after playing a few rounds of hide-and-seek, she found him, and she couldn't be happier.

"You found me, yay! I love you, Swan." "And I love spending time with you!"


 * 1) Brutal.

A lot happened over the next two acts, and it felt like a whole new episode. Mary Margaret and David arrested Isaac, and his reasoning behind everything was super dumb. Belle found a dying Rumple and admitted that she doesn't love Will (rather callously, might I add). Henry tried to bring his father back with his powers, but learned he could not, deciding that no one deserves the power he has. Lily talked about wanting to find her father, who apparently raped her mother while in dragon form. Belle then burst into Granny's during the third big "Welcome back!" or whatever party, warning everyone of what had happened. And then all my little theories started to come into fruition…

First off, I had this idea early into the arc that Rumple would take the heart of either Ursula, Cruella or Maleficent's heart and crack it open like an egg, allowing the darkness to fall from it like a rotten yolk and into Emma's pink heart – thus he would literally fill her heart with darkness. Although we never got to see that, watching the hat pull the darkness from Rumple's heart was a real treat for me, and tbh it didn't even feel contrived or stupid. Felt natural.

"We'z gunna have lots of grape jello after this."

After the darkness fucked off by itself, the Apprentice revealed that the Sorcerer was Merlin, which we all kind of called really. Everyone was tracking the flying CGI poop, and it eventually decided that it'd rape Regina, who YOLO'd upon the occasion. Emma refused to let this happen, because Regina had worked too hard for her happiness. BAHAHAHAHA! What crap! Regina's entire storyline for the last 22 or so episodes has been about finding some dude so that he can hand her happy ending to her on a silver platter! Any "work" she's done has been all kinda selfish, really. But, whatever. Emma decided that she would consent to the Dark One rape, and the darkness was kinda into that 'cause it swarmed her arm and starting humping it all sexy-like – but not after she tells Hook that she loves him!

"One last kiss?" "Nope."

And then Emma floated into the air, and we got the final shot of the season. One that I called months in advance, ngl. It was so cliché that my eyes still kinda ache from rolling so hard. We got… this.



As in, "Bye, …"

So yeah, looks like we're in for a Camelot-themed half season with Emma as the Big Bad? What will Lily do? Or Maleficent? Or Zelena? Will Will (hehe) finally find relevance on this show? Will Robin Hood finally be a mainie? Did I forget like half the jokes I was probably gonna tell? Maybe… Only time can know for sure. See you in September, OUaT! And, after this display, you kinda won't be missed.